You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
