I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
