what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize