proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Randomize
