whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize