How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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