Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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