You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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