I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
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