I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
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