3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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