no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Randomize
