lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
