You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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