Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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