I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Randomize
