Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
PANTIES FOUND
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