also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
