Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
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