Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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