i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
