I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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