so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize