He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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