make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize
