She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Randomize
