i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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