The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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