I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I checked into jail on foursquare
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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