Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
