If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
The adults are the big ones right?
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
