I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Randomize