Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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