I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize
