K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Randomize
