Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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