Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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