HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Randomize