I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
