so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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