I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize
