Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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