let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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