Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize
