i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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