i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
Randomize
