Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
