We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Randomize
