please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
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