i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize
